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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24449554">colours move noisily</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/phototropisms/pseuds/phototropisms'>phototropisms</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>(its right after shisui tries to kill himself it checks out), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Humor, Blind Character, Gen, No editing we die like mne, Obito and Shisui are both stupid and i love them, Recovery, Suicidal Thoughts, do not copy to another site, magical workaround</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 10:22:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,530</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24449554</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/phototropisms/pseuds/phototropisms</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>He shouldn’t be alive. He can’t be alive, it doesn’t make any sense. </p><p>He feels his heart drumming away against his ribs, over and over. Impossibly loud, impossibly alive.</p><p>There’s another sound alongside it: after a few more frantic seconds Shisui recognises it as running water. </p><p><em>Right, I threw myself into the Nakano,</em> he thinks before the heaviness of unconsciousness grips him. </p><p>---</p><p>AU: Shisui Survives.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Uchiha Obito &amp; Uchiha Shisui</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>100</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>colours move noisily</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_wanna_be_the_very_best/gifts">i_wanna_be_the_very_best</a>.</li>



    </ul><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Happy Birthday Lima!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> “Shadows are audible. Colours move noisily. The night is a loud, populous phantom”</em>
</p><p>— Homero Aridjis, from Persephone (trans. Betty Ferber)</p><p>---</p><p>He doesn’t understand why he’s conscious.</p><p>Is he even conscious? </p><p>He combs through his memories of the last thing he can remember. </p><p>
  <em>Darkness.</em>
</p><p>No, that can’t be right, can it? He has photographic memory, he must remember something.</p><p>
  <em>Falling.</em>
</p><p>Was he in a fight? Is that why his body aches so much? No, that doesn’t sound right. </p><p>
  <em>Itachi.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Oh, no.</em>
</p><p>He shouldn’t be alive. He can’t be alive, it doesn’t make any sense. </p><p>He feels his heart drumming away against his ribs, over and over. Impossibly loud, impossibly alive.</p><p>There’s another sound alongside it: after a few more frantic seconds Shisui recognises it as running water. </p><p><em>Right, I threw myself into the Nakano,</em> he thinks before the heaviness of unconsciousness grips him. </p><p>---</p><p>Next time he wakes up he can feel the rough sensation of cotton against his skin. His limbs are still abnormally heavy and when -with great difficulty - he brings his hand to his face he can feel bandages, and hollows where his eyes used to be. </p><p>Someone’s been looking after him, for what reason, he doesn’t know. He’s a blind Uchiha, he’s not valuable anymore. <em>Unless,</em> Danzō’s the one who’s done this and has another sick scheme of dissuading his clan. The thought alone brings the taste of bile to Shisui’s mouth. </p><p>He needs to escape wherever ‘here’ is and warn the others, warn the village. Expose Danzō for the monster he truly is. If he can get the Sandaime to see... </p><p>His thoughts form and pull apart several plans as he drifts off again.</p><p>The sound of footsteps causes Shisui to stir once more. He doesn’t feel as tired this time, though getting out of this bed sounds like being asked to run a marathon still. </p><p>“I know you’re awake,” the footsteps have a voice. It’s deep and ever so slightly bitchy. Not one he recognises as ANBU, though it could be a foundation agent. </p><p>“Yeah, well I’m bored of being unconscious,” Shisui quips, using sarcasm and humour to cover up just how lost he is, “how long have I been here?” </p><p>“About two weeks,” the voice says. </p><p>Shisui can hear the soft <em>thud</em> of a chair being placed on the floor near him. </p><p>“I’m surprised you don’t have questions,” the voice continues, “if it was me waking up in a mysterious cave with a strange man I’ve never met before I wouldn’t shut up.” </p><p>“Who says I don’t have questions?” </p><p>The man chuckles, and it's as low as his voice. </p><p>“Go ahead.” </p><p>“Where am I?” </p><p>“I can’t tell you that,” </p><p>“<em>Great</em>,“ if Shisui still had eyes, he’d roll them, “How am I alive?” </p><p>“You nearly weren’t. I found you floating down the river, half dead.” </p><p>“I was supposed to die,” Shisui says, bitter. </p><p>“You’re an Uchiha, we’re not easy to kill.” </p><p><em>We?</em> Shisui thinks, <em>He’s an Uchiha?</em></p><p>“Who are you?” </p><p>“An old legend,” the man says, clearly enjoying himself. </p><p><em>Okay, he’s definitely an Uchiha. Drama queen,</em> Shisui muses to himself, trying to remember his history. He can think of a couple though some of them are way too old to be alive and talking to him right now. So he takes a guess. </p><p>“Obito?” he says, and he swears he can feel the temperature of the room drop by several degrees. </p><p>For two seconds he feels weightless, and then he‘s met with the impact with cold stone. There’s a kunai pressing down on his throat and the weight of a human against his ribs. </p><p>“Wh-“</p><p>“How do you know?” the man -Obito - says, his voice different now: not as deep, a lot closer in timbre to what he remembers his older cousin sounding as a kid. </p><p>“I took a guess? It was either going to be you, or Kagami or something,” every instict Shisui’s had drilled into him is on fire, but his body is still too weak from his suicide attempt to respond, “Get off me.” </p><p>To Shisui’s surprise, Obito listens. </p><p>“You don’t sound surprised to be talking to a dead man,” he says. </p><p>“We’re both meant to be dead, cousin,” Shisui points out, and he notes the sharp inhale from Obito. </p><p>“You can’t tell anyone else. This is between you and me.” </p><p>“There’s others? Not just you in your weird man-cave saving wayward desperate teenagers?” </p><p>“There’s an... Organisation,” Obito says, hesitantly, “They’re called the Akatsuki. None of them know my identity.” </p><p>“Why would they?” Nothing surprises Shisui anymore. </p><p>“A couple of them, the higher ups, know me as Madara,” Obito explains.</p><p>“Madara?” Shisui asks, “As in, founder of Konohagakure Madara? Tamer of the Kyuubi Madara? Went crazy and attacked the village Madara?” </p><p>“Yes, him.”</p><p>“Do I want to know why?” Shisui presses. </p><p>“It’s best not, for your own good.” </p><p>
  <em>Ha!</em>
</p><p>“Alright then, <em>Madara</em>,” Shisui can’t keep the sarcasm from seeping into his voice, “What about the others?” </p><p>“They know me as Tobi. You should also call me that.” </p><p>“Oh, Obito. What have you gotten both of us into?” </p><p>---</p><p>Slowly but surely, Shisui’s body starts to heal. He’s still not used to being blind, doesn’t think he’ll ever be. But he can walk now, running his hand against the wall to navigate. </p><p>The first time he managed to eat solid food, he ate so quickly he was instantly sick. Just as his hearing is much more sensitive now, so are his other senses, and taste is no exception. </p><p>His legs are covered in bruises from bumping into objects, and his arm, which he broke on impact with the water, is still in its cast. It seems that the Akatsuki either don’t have a healer,  or Obito hasn’t told them about him yet. </p><p>Two weeks after their first conversation, Obito brings him dumplings that Shisui instantly recognises as Akemi’s from her shop. Only the Uchiha district would put this much chilli in the filling. Needless to say, he devours them. </p><p>“You’ve been to the village,” Shisui isn’t asking. </p><p>He’s met with an awkward silence. </p><p>“Oh. I was nodding,” Obito explains, sheepish, “Sorry. Yes, I’ve been to the village.” </p><p>“How are things?” Shisui isn’t going to ask how he got in undetected. Let Obito keep his secrets, he doesn’t really care. </p><p>“Tense,” Obito says through a mouthful of dumpling, “How familiar are you with the situation?” </p><p>“Too familiar,” Shisui says, tone dark, “Once my arm is healed, I’m going after Danzō.” </p><p>“I don’t think that’s a good idea-“</p><p>“I don’t care. Obito, I can’t let him tear the village apart, or hurt anyone I care about.” </p><p>He’s thinking of Itachi, only twelve, with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Of Sasuke, who’s too young to understand what is going on, yet still affected by everything nonetheless. Of his mom, now in an empty house (his own fault, really). Of his friends outside the clan: Tenzō, who will likely be dragged to the frontline of this conflict. Iruka, sweet and caring Iruka who’s probably working hard to keep this from affecting his students. Before he knows it, Shisui is crying. He didn’t even realise he still could, until the tears were already rolling down his cheeks. </p><p>Now that he’s crying, he finds he can’t stop. He misses his home. He misses his mom. He misses Tenzō’s stupid puns in the locker room, misses teasing him over his obvious crush. He misses his little cousins, though Itachi’s not that little anymore, Shisui’s never stopped thinking of him as such. </p><p>Once the homesickness washes away, he’s hit with the next wave of emotions: guilt. Guilt at his failure towards Danzō, towards the village. Guilt at leaving his still grieving mother to an empty house, at burdening her with more grief. Guilt at the intense work and expectations he’s passed on to Itachi, along with his eye. Guilt that he’s somehow still alive, how he couldn’t even kill himself successfully. </p><p>Obito gently taps his shoulder twice, a signal they’ve developed so he doesn’t startle Shisui, and then pulls the younger boy into an almost crushing hug. Shisui’s hands bunch up the fabric of his shirt tightly as muffled sobs shake his shoulders. He’s grateful that Obito doesn’t try to get him to stop, that he instead lets Shisui cry. He needs this, he’s been holding his head right above the surface since he woke up, and now he’s drowning.</p><p>His breathing starts to stabilise as his guilt ebbs away. Shisui knows he will need to process all that at some point but for the time being he let’s it go. And as he does, he finds himself becoming angry. He’s angry at Danzō for everything he’s done, and angry at himself for not dying. Mainly at Danzō. </p><p><em>Well, that's good</em>, he thinks, <em>I can work with anger.</em></p><p>“Sorry,” he says, his voice thick from tears, “Don’t know what came over me.” </p><p>Obito let’s him go, without saying anything. If Shisui didn’t know any better, he’d swear he can hear the gears in his head turning. </p><p>“It’s okay,” Obito says, after about a minute of nothing, “You still care about them, huh?” </p><p>“As do you, even though you pretend not to.” </p><p>“The last person I cared about died long ago,” Obito says, and then gets up. </p><p>As the door creaks open, he speaks one last time: “Happy birthday, Shisui.” </p><p>Shisui realises he completely forgot.</p><p>---</p><p>Apparently the Akatsuki <em>do</em> have a healer. Kakuzu is the grumpiest man Shisui has ever met, but when he’s done Shisui’s arm feels as good as new. He also doesn’t ask any questions, which is good because Shisui would have no idea how to answer them. </p><p>As much as Shisui wants to get back to the village and warn them, he knows he realistically has a long way to recover before he can do that. He’s still sleeping half the day to regain strength, and is terrible at navigating day to day activities without his sight. He’s working on it. </p><p>Obito helps sometimes. Most of the time it consists of him shouting “think fast” and throwing inanimate objects at Shisui. So far he’s been smacked in the face every time.</p><p>At night he dreams of leaving. His heart longs for home in a way he never imagined. Shisui knows once he steps outside of the cave he’s in, the first breath of fresh air will be the most intoxicating feeling in the world. Sometimes the dreams are so real he wakes up lost, searching for the wind, the sun, the sounds of nature. He is always met with suffocating silence.</p><p>“Have you tried moulding chakra since I found you?” Obito asks one morning, sounding suspiciously chipper. </p><p>“No, I’ve been kinda focused on walking around without bumping into inanimate objects,” Shisui tells him, “Not being able to see does limit what I can do.”</p><p>“Yeah, not having the Sharingan anymore does change things-”</p><p>“That’s not it. I’m more than just our kekkei genkai!” Shisui keeps his irritation at bay as best he can, “But I can’t figure out how body flicker would work without seeing my surroundings. Or any shuriken tricks.” </p><p>Obito laughs, a carefree sound that’s distinctly different to his raspy voice. </p><p>“What?” Shisui asks, turning to the direction of the sound. </p><p>“Well, you want to go after Danzō, don’t you?” </p><p>“What’s your point, Obito?”</p><p>“You’re gonna need to figure out how, you can’t just recklessly charge in. That’s just going to get you killed.”</p><p>“I’m already dead. What’s the difference.”</p><p>“So am I,” Obito reminds, “but you know that’s a suicide mission.” </p><p><em>Good,</em> Shisui thinks, “What do you care?”</p><p>“I went out of my way to keep you alive,” Obito feigns nonchalance, “I don’t want you spoiling all my hard work.” </p><p>“You have plans for me,” Shisui guesses. </p><p>Obito sighs in frustration, “Is it that difficult to believe I don’t have an ulterior motive?” </p><p>Shisui scowls, hoping that gets his point across. </p><p>“You’re family,” Obito explains, “whatever the hell that means.” </p><p>Shisui’s left to his own devices for the next few days. He memorises the layout of the cave he’s in. There’s a series of empty rooms and corridors. There’s a weird wooden structure in the largest of them. He reasons it’s not a tree since he’s still underground, and the thing is slightly warm to the touch which trees definitely don’t do. He decides he does <em>not </em>want to know what the hell it is, because everything about this entire situation is messed up enough as it is. </p><p>“I brought you some stuff,” Obito says when he returns before dumping a handful of objects on the table, “Hopefully these help.”</p><p>Shisui picks one up to examine it, and quickly realises what it is.</p><p>“These are scrolls,” he says. </p><p>“Yup,” Obito says, proud of himself, “I had to sneak into a lot of high security places for them. They’re all sensory techniques you can learn.” </p><p>“Obito,” Shisui repeats himself, “These are scrolls.” </p><p>He waits a couple of seconds for Obito to catch up.</p><p>“Oh, I’m <em>stupid</em>.” </p><p>Shisui finds himself laughing very quickly, “It’s the thought that counts.” </p><p>“I really hoped I could help,” Obito grumbles. </p><p>“Maybe you still can. You could read them out loud?” </p><p> </p><p>The process is a slow and painful one. For each jutsu Obito first has to read out the entire scroll contents, then describe any diagrams before Shisui can conceptualise what he’s supposed to be doing. Obito has to repeat sections often to Shisui. By the end of the day they’ve made it through one scroll with no results and Shisui’s dead on his feet. </p><p>“Why is earth style this difficult?” he says, sitting on the floor in exasperation. </p><p>“Could you do any earth release before?” Obito asks, and Shisui shakes his head, “Hm, maybe this one won’t work at all. At least I had fun sneaking into Iwa.” </p><p>“What else have you got?” </p><p>“Uh,” Obito shuffles through the scrolls, “Another earth release and a wind release from Suna, some water releases from Kiri which I’ll be completely honest are shots in the dark, a lightning scroll and a yin scroll from Kumo, a couple of space-time ones from Ame and Cha, and an old Uchiha one.” </p><p>“An Uchiha one?” Shisui’s ears perk up, “Why would we need a sensory technique?” </p><p>“Probably for situations like yours. Before Konoha was founded, sharingan fetched a pretty price on the black market. Still do, if anyone can get their hands on one.” </p><p>“Let’s try that one tomorrow.” </p><p>---</p><p>The first time Shisui successfully carries out the jutsu he drops it almost immediately out of sheer shock. It must be written all over his face, because Obito asks what’s happened. </p><p>“It works!” Shisui can’t keep his delight hidden, hands weaving the signs for the jutsu again. </p><p>“What’s it like?” Obito asks. </p><p>The moment Shisui’s hands form the last sign the world is transformed. All his senses are on fire. He can sense the heat coming off of Obito, the table, everything in his surroundings. The world is painted scarlet, pulsing with every beat of Shisui’s frenzied heart. He has to remind himself to breathe. </p><p>“Its…” Shisui struggles to find the words, “Do you remember the first time you used the sharingan? How the world was suddenly bright red and a lot slower than you’d seen before?” </p><p>“Uh-huh”</p><p>“Sort of the same feeling? Except it’s through every cell on your skin instead of your eyes.” </p><p>“That sounds overwhelming.” </p><p>“It is.” Shisui pauses, breathless, “I want to try it outside.” </p><p>The sun drowns out everything else, so bright and warm that Shisui almost drops the jutsu again. After ten seconds, he gets used to it, and the details of the world shape up around him. There’s rock all around him, forming a crater like structure. In the middle of it all there’s what Shisui can only describe as a rib cage. Beyond that, trees spread out in all directions. </p><p>“Love what you’ve done to the place,” he says, pointing at the giant bones. </p><p>Obito’s porcelain mask doesn’t hide his expressions from this jutsu, so Shisui senses his eye roll and cracks a smile. </p><p>The next few weeks pass with Shisui getting used to his new ‘sight’, attuning it to his movements, and carefully trying different techniques alongside it. He gets so excited the first time he pulls off a body flicker that he flickers right into one of the bones at the centre of the crater and gives himself a bloody nose (Obito makes fun of him). At night, Shisui spends the hours between dreams and reality forming a plan for Danzō. </p><p>“How do you vanish into thin air?” He asks Obito one day, after Obito materialises next to him. </p><p>Obito points to his eye. </p><p>“Your mangekyō? How can you still see out of that eye?” </p><p>“Luck? A lot of my body heals itself since it’s artificial flesh, I guess that extends to my eye.” </p><p>“Hold on, what?” </p><p>“Long story,” Obito says with a smile that signifies he won’t explain anything.</p><p>“Obito, don’t you dare disappear. Come ba- <em>and he’s gone</em>.” </p><p>---</p><p>Shisui starts to form a solid plan. He takes inventory, plots out his route into and out of the village, makes notes of every defence he can remember and starts coming up with countermeasures until he can recite them in his sleep. </p><p>He tells Obito about it, and together they fine tune the details. A week before they’re set to go, Obito drops off the face of the earth. Shisui tries not to worry about it too much. It’s not rare for him to clam up about Akatsuki business. As the days drag by, the bad feeling brewing in Shisui’s stomach gets worse and worse. He’s tempted to set off for Konoha on his own, but key parts of their plan hinge on Obito’s kamui. </p><p>When Obito <em>does </em>return -some ten days later- Shisui can sense something’s changed. </p><p>“So when’s the next window for our plan?” He asks. </p><p>“There isn’t going to be one,” Obito says, looking anywhere but at Shisui, “I met Itachi.” </p><p>The air drops a couple of degrees. </p><p>“He’s been given some sort of ultimatum,” he continues, “and he’s asked for my help.” </p><p>“To do what?” Shisui asks, already knowing the answer but unwilling to believe it. </p><p>Obito stays quiet, gathering himself before he forces out the reply: “To kill every Uchiha in the village, except for Sasuke.” </p><p>Even though Shisui knew this was coming, the air is still crushed out of his lungs. He pushes down on the urge to be sick. </p><p>“You can’t have agreed to that,” he says, desperate for a way out of this nightmare turn of events. </p><p>“I did,” Obito’s voice is so devoid of emotion that Shisui can’t bring himself to anger, “Better me than some innocent kid dragged into this.” </p><p>Shisui wants to scream until his voice is raw. He wants to break something. He wants to go back in time and stop himself from jumping in the river because it would be him trapped between the clan and the village, not Itachi. </p><p>“Itachi <em>is </em>some innocent kid,” He manages to say, “It was supposed to be me, Obito! I volunteered to the Hokage to mediate the balance between the clan and the village. To stop <em>exactly this situation</em> from happening.” </p><p>“It’s too late for that now,” Obito’s voice is still monotone, detached. Shisui can’t bring himself to listen any longer. He storms off, the anger that had been simmering in his heart this whole time finally comes to a boil and spills out, compelling him to move. He doesn’t know where he’s going. He doesn’t really care. Obito finds him on a tree angrily shredding leaves a few hours later. </p><p>“My mother still lives in the village,” Shisui’s voice is heavy from tears. </p><p>“My grandmother too,” Obito offers up information, something he’s not done since Shisui woke up. It catches him by surprise, “I’ve not seen her since I was twelve.”  </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Shisui says, meaning it. </p><p>“What’s happening isn’t your fault, Shisui,” Obito sits on the branch next to him, “we both know Danzō would have attempted something like this, one way or another.” </p><p>“Do me a favour,” </p><p>“Anything,” </p><p>“Make sure my mom doesn’t suffer.” </p><p>They sit in silence for what feels like hours, until Shisui runs out of leaves to terrorise. It doesn’t feel real, it <em>can’t </em>be real. Shisui catches himself trying to release a genjutsu multiple times, even though he knows this is reality: harsh and unforgiving. </p><p>“What’s going to happen to Itachi?” He asks eventually. </p><p>“He’ll be deemed a rogue ninja. I’ve offered him shelter within the Akatsuki.” </p><p>Shisui nods. </p><p>“What about you?” Obito asks. </p><p>“Danzō should be brought to justice.” </p><p>“I never had you down as a revenge person,” Obito says, before adding, “Do you want me to bring you back a pair of eyes?” </p><p>“What the fuck?”</p><p>“Watch your fucking language,” Obito says, before sliding off the tree branch and landing on the soft underbrush, “I was trying to see something positive in the situation.” </p><p>“It wouldn’t be right,” Shisui replies, “plus, justice is blind.” </p><p>He swears he hears Obito mutter ‘Drama queen’ under his breath as he leaves.</p>
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